The road less traveled…

My partner and I were attempting to become pregnant. For many reasons – including my sanity – we have put that on the back burner for now and are just working on walking down the road less traveled. We've been through Katrina – moved to Colorado – and our next adventure is headed to California.

8 DPI… February 3, 2011

Filed under: 2WW — 2Lesbians&Baby @ 4:01 pm
Tags: , , ,

…and getting more anxious to test by the minute.

The plan is to wait until NEXT Friday to do the test (2-11-11), but I doubt that I’m going to make it that far.  I should be able to test with an early HPT by even Tuesday, but of course I found this article online and now I don’t know if I WANT to test/know early!  This excerpt is what worries me:

The down side is the expense of repetetive testing and the anxiety that it can cause. If you test for pregnancy before a missed period, you will pick up chemical pregnancies. This occurs when the sperm does meet the egg and pregnancy is established, but it is not a good pregnancy (most often a chromosomal problem in the embryo) and is lost very early on. Without early testing this cycle may be normal, slightly delayed, or heavier. Up to 50% of pregnancies diagnosed before the missed period end in miscarraige.

Now there is a side of me that is like, WTF!! Who wrote that?  Where is the study that shows those numbers?  Is that a doctor’s point of view?  “Up to” 50%, does that mean 47% or 5%?  This is from the internet, where anyone can write anything, but what if it’s true?  I don’t want to detect a chemical pregnancy and be even more devastated, BLAH!

I’m keeping my head positive – PUPO I am – but the rational side of me keeps wavering back and forth wildly.  One second I’m absolutely certain that I’m pregnant, and the next I’m absolutely certain that I am not.  I can say that I do feel different this time than the last times at home, but this really could be simply because I know that it was DONE differently so I’m psyching myself out differently.

Being a psychology student is so difficult – you can recognize your irrational thoughts and understand they are irrational, but can’t stop them anyway!

So – I’ve changed my background on my work computer to be a slideshow of photos that I’ve found across the net of sleeping babes.  When I do have this baby, he/she is going to have a MILLION PHOTOS taken of him/her – just like these!

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5 Responses to “8 DPI…”

  1. slcurwin Says:

    Oh, that is stupid. I just wrote a big scarey rant and erased it because it’s not what you need to hear right now.
    It comes down to “would you want to know either way”. I would, but that’s me. Everyone is diefferent.

  2. casey Says:

    I love your positivity! And the babys are SOOO CUUUTTEEEE!!!!!

    Keep your chin up and hope in your heart!

  3. Hope Says:

    H1 tested today. Negative of course. Its TOO early. Love the pictures. They gave me a good.smile before bed.

  4. isa Says:

    It sucks, doesn’t it? Because if you find out and get excited and then it doesn’t stick you’ll be devastated, but at least you know that you can get pregnant. I find that dollar store tests (and internet cheapies) take out the financial aspect, but the emotional one is still a struggle. You’re pregnant, though! So all you need is to be patient and spend some time deciding which poses to start the photo session off with…

  5. Momma L Says:

    I always seem to get anxious and test too early … then the disappointment of the BFN sets in. it’s SO hard to get through the entire 2WW, but each month I’ve been able to hold out longer and longer. I’m determined that next month I’ll be able to wait out ALL 2 weeks. lol

    keep strong! you’ll get through it. just keep a smile on your face, even if you have to fake it. lol … it’s helps, I promise!


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